Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Rachel Storch Lightin' the Torch

Not being from St. Louis, I hadn’t heard of Rachel Storch before Wednesday night. And yet, she’s always been my hero. She’s everything that I’ve always wanted to be—she’s a young, fully educated, gorgeous, Jewish woman in an elected position of power. So far I’ve got the “young” and “Jewish woman” thing going for me.

Rachel Storch has all of these qualities that make her distinct and unique. And yet, she outright told me that she tries to see beyond her race, gender, age, or background when she goes to work. Her job is to represent all of the people of District 64. There isn’t room for personal loyalties or biases. What a beautiful idea.

However, even though she tries her best to avoid categorizing herself, she hasn’t failed to notice the dearth of Jewish or female representatives in Jefferson City. Right now there are six Jewish representatives out of 163. When she started out there was only one, and her name was Rachel Storch. As for females, they make up only 20% of the House. Rachel readily admits that she is part of an organization that finds qualified female candidates and encourages them to run for state congress. Women won’t be elected if they don’t put themselves on the ballot.

Unfortunately, though, Rachel describes the quest for female candidates as rather difficult. Women tend to run only if they are young with no children (and no imminent plans to have children) or if they are older, with children who have already moved out of the house. The common theme is that young children put the big kibosh on a woman’s willingness to run for public office.

While children can be financially and emotionally exhausting, it’s a shame that they are the main reason why Missourians aren’t equally represented by both sexes. And so, in true LegallyBrunette fashion, I’ve come up with a solution— The (Congressional) Baby-sitter’s Club.

You may remember the book series by Ann M. Martin. The original Baby-sitter’s Club is about a group of girls, also best friends, who navigate the waters of middle school, adolescence, and babysitting together.

For those of you who want to ensure gender equality in the Missouri General Assembly (and become best friends who navigate the waters of post-college indecision together), The (Congressional) Baby-sitter’s Club is the perfect option. We will probably earn more than minimum wage while watching the children of state representatives.

Perks of the job include Capri Suns, Blue's Clues on DVD, and women in power who are exceedingly grateful to you. Maybe they’ll write you a recommendation. They might even let you put “Chief Aide” on your resume. Anything for the young woman who changes a dirty diaper during a House vote.

So for those of you interested in applying to The (Congressional) Baby-sitter’s Club, I’m looking for people to fill the following positions. (As laid out at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Baby-Sitters_Club).


Kristin "Kristy" Amanda Thomas

Club position: President

Appearance: Shoulder-length dark brown hair, brown eyes, usually worn in pony-tail, friendly smile, short for her age

Kristy is known for her great ideas (mainly, The Baby-sitters Club), as well as her bossiness and a big mouth that can occasionally get her into trouble. Something of a tomboy, Kristy is usually in her "uniform" of jeans and a t-shirt (in the winter, a turtleneck and, if needed, a sweater) sneakers, and sometimes a baseball cap, and she loves sports, even coaching a softball team for younger children, known as Kristy's Krushers.


Claudia "Claud" Lynn Kishi

Club position: Vice president

Appearance: Long jet black hair, almond shaped brown eyes, perfect and creamy complexion

Claudia is Japanese-American and extremely creative in both her artistic endeavors and her funky and cool wardrobe. Both generally take up more of her attention than
her schoolwork; she is particularly horrible at spelling. Her grades are so bad (with the exception of art), she is briefly sent back to seventh grade.


Anastasia "Stacey" Elizabeth McGill

Club position: Treasurer

Appearance: Sometimes permed honey blond hair, blue eyes, slender

A native New Yorker, Stacey moved to Stoneybrook in the seventh grade when her father's company transferred him there. She quickly became friends with Claudia, because of their love for fashion and boys. They are known to be the best dressers at Stoneybrook Middle School (Stacey is the more sophisticated dresser, while Claudia is more funky.)

You may notice that I left out Mary Anne Spier, BSC secretary, from the available positions. That’s because I want to be the new Mary Anne Spier (since I can’t actually be Rachel Storch). Mary Anne regularly dates this kid named Logan, and even though he’s a fictional character in a book for little girls, I’ve always imagined him to be quite dreamy.

Please send applications ASAP. If the BSC can conquer middle school together, (C)BSC can surely conquer the gender disparity in Missouri politics.

And if you have a more feasible idea, we'd like to hear that too! Feel free to email thestloujew@gmail.com

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